Best Anniversary Card Ever

Just got a card addressed to The Right Reverend Jesse and Mrs. Gardner in the mail today from a good friend. The message is too good not to share:

“In honor of your 3rd year of wedded bliss, a LEATHER gift is in order. I have selected one of our goats for slaughter, just let me know whether your prefer a large doily or several soda can wrappers.”

I’ll take a mousepad, please.

(Full disclosure: my wife and I sang the second song on Mark’s album Here We Stand at our wedding.)